Thursday, November 27, 2008

Help Martha is at it Again - A work of Fiction

From time to time I feel like Martha is back at her old tricks - yes she is my stalker! Honest, how else can you explain these bizarre phenomenon?

All my books and cd's have been not only alphabetized but sorted according to their genre.

There is a bowl of fresh pancake batter in my fridge along with blueberries picked just this morning - is she hinting for an invite to breakfast perhaps?

The dust bunnies are outside with picket signs - quite creative I might add! Of course they are saying 'Martha Go' and other such gibberish that only a dust bunny could think of with its itty bitty brain.

The dog and cat bowl has been replaced with a beautiful hand thrown pottery, purchased from an exotic location - the tupperware one is nowhere to be seen.

My napkins are constantly folded into shapes of swans, crowns and much more!

Wait a minute - we have napkins - oh now she's done it!!!

The linens are perfectly ironed and smell like lavender.

The cupboards have all been organized. The spices all have a new container, every type of dried staple food is in a jar and the canned goods are alphabetized and categorized.

The dog is wearing booties - no more wet paw messes and the cat has been to a pet groomer, poor girl - did she really have to give her a poodle cut?

Not only is the toilet paper always filled, the rolls are always folded into a nice v tip - I'll give her that I am impressed that I no longer have to search the house for new rolls - a real Godsend, maybe I'll get her leaving me a chocolate on my pillow next.

So if any of these things happen at your house you'll know who the culprit is - you may find some of it annoying but the odd thing she may do will be really helpful. For those of us who aren't 'Martha's this is for you!


  1. LOL

    My Mom used to fold her toilet paper into a "v" ... I was afraid to use it.

    Our dust bunnies have been evicted. Our spices ARE alphabetized. But no swan napkins here. I'm just NOT that coordinated. I'd have them tied in a knot in no time.

  2. Sad to say that all that stuff appeals to me - of course if Martha comes over to do it, that is.