Monday, September 07, 2009

Back away I'm Mr. Independent

One of the hardest things to do as a parent is watch your children make mistakes. When they're little you plug up the holes in all the electrical outlets and bubble wrap the furniture. Even then if they get an oweeeeee you can just put a bandaid on it and kiss it better, most of the time.

Then they get older and they go to school and you have to back off a bit. You can guide and teach but you can't make them study or do the book report or if they do it you can't make them hand it in. They are growing into their independence. Sometimes it's very hard to watch you just want to step in with the bubble wrap and make it all ok.

Then the next phase comes and it's not an easy one to handle as a parent. No amount of child proofing can help. It's the 'I'm an adult now and know what I'm doing' phase. After going through all the other childhood experiences I have to admit this is in all honesty the hardest!!!

This phase is a new one for me and I don't know how to deal with it. Our 20 yr old son has decided that after meeting a girl on FB this last winter and in person just at the end of July that he's ready to move in with her and play house. Not only that but he didn't even had the decency to tell us in a proper manner, instead it was an off hand remark at the end of a family bbq with a 'I'll be by to get the rest of my things'. So he's feeling like super grown up now - he's ready to take on the world and any qualms we may have have been pushed aside and poo pooed. He's angry that we haven't jumped up and down and said this is the best thing ever. Well I'm not going to as I don't think it is. I barely know the girl, he hasn't even given me the decency of telling me her last name. It seems like they are both wrapped up in each other and the rest of the world can just butt out.

So I'm moody and angry and a whole lot of other feelings and if I'm not blogging a lot it's because I really don't know what to say and I've probably said enough. This is my eldest and I really thought he was a different person and I'm shocked and saddened by his choices and lack of respect for his family.


  1. Consider this a cyber hug! ()

  2. I'll add another cyber-hug!


  3. I will keep him in my prayers! After having six leave home under various circumstances I would suggest that probably the less you say to him the better. Just be there to listen when things take a down turn! My hugs too!

  4. I can so relate to this and I send you many many hugs

  5. Big cyber hug from me too. But you know what, you are doing the right thing, it's hard to watch, but it's the only way they learn. There does come a time for them to move on.
    So I guess this means he is responsible for all of his bills including cell phone, car insurance and all those other pesky household bills?
    Hang in there! (It could be worse...)